Guns knives and crucifixes
by Leaking Spectrum
Summary: My first submission on this site! Yay! Anyway, this will contain FlippyXFlaky. No sexual themes. Temporary hiatus! Will update in the future at a later date.
1. Chapter 1

_The soldier ran franticly through the underbrush, his lungs heaving as his body tried desperately to get more oxygen. Every Breathe brought with it a sharp sting. He felt a bullet whizz past his ear and dived downwards, his frantic eyes searching for some sort of cover. His breath caught on something – a bit of spittle, maybe – and he entered a coughing fit. Then there was a loud, ear-popping BANG and he felt something sickeningly wet on his chest. He groped at it, and his paw came away red with his own life essence. _It doesn't hurt.._ he thought, his mind growing foggy. _It should hurt, shouldn't it..?

Fippy's eyes shot open, he emitted a sound like that of a strangled duck, and fell off of his bed. He sat up and rubbed his forehead, grumbling. _Another nightmare.._ He got to his feet and readjusted his beret, making his way to the bathroom. Flippy sighed as he got out a bottle of pills from his medicine cabinet. The small oval-ish objects rattled inside as he shook a few out into his mint-green paw. He dumped them into his mouth and shuddered as he forced himself to swallow. They tasted like earwax and bees. The green bear poked his tongue out in disgust. "Bleh.."

Flaky hummed to herself as she made her bed. She absently scratched at her quills with her right paw, scattering flakes of dandruff on the ground around her. She sighed. It was the sharpness of her quills that prevented her from washing them properly. She made sure they were clean, sure, but she couldn't wash the shampoo _out_ properly. Sure, she smelt nice, but it irritated her scalp. 

And I just used sure 3 three times in the same paragraph. Yay for me. – Emerald

Flaky, satisfied with her bed's condition, set about packing her bag for the camping trip they had planned tonight. To be honest, she was nervous, but hey, socializing was important for someone as timid as her. Apple, check. Marshmallows, check. Sleeping bag, check. First Aid Kit, Checkitty check check. Never hurts to be too careful. Except for Petunia... She decided to miss this one out. Just as well, with all the dirt and stuff. After packing other needed items such as a water bottle, Flaky forced her quills on her back to lie flat and slipped her backpack on. Oof, it was heavier than what she was used to. But she could handle it. She made her way carefully down the stairs and out the door, smiling as she felt the warm sunshine on her face. Somehow, she thought today would end better than all the others. Maybe she was right. Maybe she was wrong.


	2. Chapter 2

Flippy waved as he saw Cuddles at the supermarket.

"Heya Flippy! How're you?" Before Flippy could answer, Cuddles continued with what he was saying "Hey! Me and some friends are going on a camping trip this Arvo', wanna come along? It's gunna be fun! There'll be campfire songs and s'mores and-"

Flippy took the first chance he could get to interrupt the motormouthed rabbit. "Ok, sounds great. "  
>"Don't forget! It's in the tree forest, see you there!" Cuddles called as he had already re-assumed his shopping, picking up various supplies.<br>"Heh." Flippy smiled. It was good to see people so happy despite everything. He went back to picking up supplies, deciding to add in a few camp supplies for the evening.

Later, Flaky made her way to the campsite her friends had set up. She had packed earlier that morning because she had plans for most of the day and didn't want to have to leave her house, come back, and then leave again. That would be dumb. She smiled as she saw Mime. "Um, Hi!" She greeted him, waving, however she cringed internally at her habit of saying 'um' before almost every sentence. It didn't even make sense to say it here.

I know this is a real habit people can have because I do it too. –Emerald.

Mime smiled broadly and waved back, which made Flaky giggle. His muteness was cute and he was such a nice guy. He gestured for her to follow him. Not before long they were at the camp site and the sun had just started to set.

Lammy sat next to Toothy, hugging Mr Pickels and trying to encourage Toothy to talk to him. "He likes you, Toothy! Really!"

"...You're a nutcase, you know that?"

Flaky heard the exchange and couldn't help but snort and giggle. Sure, Lammy was pretty frightening when having an episode, but that exchange was just too funny. The red Porcupine sat herself down next to Cuddles and he, being the kind rabbit he is, immediately included her in the conversation he was having with on-again off-again but-mostly-on-again girlfriend, Giggles. They were discussing what to do in the later times of the evening. That was when Flippy arrived.

He surveyed the area for a nice place to sit. Then he saw Flaky and felt a sharp pain in his eye, remembering what happened the last time they met. He looked away quickly when he realized she knew he was staring at her. "Uhm.. Heya Flakes." He muttered awkwardly and went and sat next to Lammy.

_Great. She's here and she probably still hates me because I'm crazy but I like her and this is so awkward and ANSGHBGVF._ He tried not to portray any negative emotion, instead opting to grind his teeth and hope no-one noticed.

Flaky was feeling just as awkward. _ Why didn't he sit with us...? Is he still mad about that freak-out I had before? Oh god, I'm such an idiot... Of course he'd hate me, I stabbed him in the eye! _She chewed on her lower lip, wishing she had just stayed home that night.

Flippy tried to start up conversation with Lammy. "So, you're the new resident here, huh? Nice to meet you, my name's Flippy."

"My name's Lammy! And this is Mr Pickels! He's my best friend." Lammy's eye twitched "He says he's my only true friend..." she stared off into the distance.

"That's... Nice... I guess." _She's a complete Looney._

It was at that point that Lumpy realized he had forgotten his water bottle. He announced he was going off to the river to fetch some water and Mime offered to help.

Because I need_ someone_ to die in this chapter. – Emerald

Before long Lumpy had loaded all the empty water bottles onto Mime to carry. That was a lot. It seemed as though Lumpy had remembered to bring a surplus of empty plastic bottles, but not water. Honestly, with Lumpy being Lumpy, it wouldn't be that much of a surprise.

As Mime silently tried to keep up with the dim-witted moose, he stepped on something and heard a furious hiss in response. He jumped back in time to see an enraged snake rear up and bite him right on the neck. He silently screamed for help but no-one came to his aid. It wasn't before long that his tongue had swelled up inside his mouth and his eyes rolled back, as he lay on the ground foaming and seizing.

OK I STAYED UP UNTIL 1 AM WRITING THAT _GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY _-Emerald


	3. Chapter 3

Lumpy, finally realizing the Mime had gone missing, turned around and walked back the way he came. However, we he finally FOUND the silent purple deer, he wished he hadn't. Mime's top half had been devoured by the snake, while his still exposed legs were twitching violently. Lumpy screamed and ran back to camp.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Cuddles asked Flaky, raising his eyebrows in worry. The red porcupine looked left and right before leaning into Cuddles' ear and whispering.  
>"It's Flippy. I think he's still mad at me…"<br>"Aw, don't worry! Flippy's a cool guy, he wouldn't be mad. Hey Flippy! Come sit with us!" He said, waving at Flippy as he called out to him.

"Hm? Oh.. Alright." _WELL SHIT SON. I just hope I don't damage our friendship more than I already have…_ He got up and made his way over to them, flinching a bit as the campfire crackled. Just as he was about to sit down, Lumpy ran into the clearing, screaming bloody murder. The blue moose crashed into Sniffles and in turn, Sniffles fell into the campfire. The anteater screamed as the flames ate away at his fur and flesh. All the campers started screaming simultaneously. Flippy, reminded of Napalm and flamethrowers, shrieked (like a woman) and tried to back off before he flipped, but he was too late. _ENEMIES EVERYWHERE KILL OR BE KILLED KILL KILL KILL __**KILL THEM NOW!**_

He growled and grabbed a sharp stick that was previously used for roasting marshmallows and forced Cuddles' mouth open, jamming the stick in there. He then took out his bowie knife and cut cuddles' tongue away from the flesh on the bottom of his mouth. He caught Giggles around the neck and lodged the cut out tongue in her throat. She choked while cuddles gurgled on his own blood, bleeding to death. Flaky had quickly backed away but her quills got her stuck in a tree, where she silently hyperventilated in pure panic. Lammy was beating Toothy over the head with a pan while shouting at Mr Pickels to "STOP STOP PLEASE STOP! GET OFF OF HIM GET _OFF!_" Her eyes had gone wonky. Fliqpy sneaked up being the lavender lamb and grabbed a stitch from the neck of her jumper, pulling it and causing the neck hole to get too small, choking her. She bleated pathetically as she lay on the floor, gasping for air.

Toothy, still dazed with a slight dent in his head, tried crawling away. But Fliqpy grabbed him by his tail and pulled him back. He pulled out the purple beaver's eye and looped the optic nerve around Toothy's throat, pulling it taught and severing his head. The bear looked around for a new victim, his ears perking up when he heard a small whimper from behind him. He turned around slowly and drew his bowie knife once more, approaching the sound. It was Flaky, still pinned to the tree. He smirked and raised his knife, laughing.


	4. Chapter 4

The green raccoon smirked, his fur-covered face lit up by the faint glow of the artifact before him. He pulled off his fedora and used it to wipe the sweat off of his face. He would have to be quick with this, and careful. Judging by the amount of skeletons impaled by assorted traps surrounding this thing, it had an odd effect on tree friends: permanent death. But also judging by the sheer amount of people who had lost their lives trying to get their paws on it, it was very valuable. Shifty chewed on his tongue and steadied himself, he had easily dodged the traps so far due to the tell-tale remains of their victims. But he had no idea what touching this thing would do.

The artifact in question was a small scepter imbued with jewels. It almost seemed to hover above it's pedestal. The Kleptomaniac's paw hesitated next to it for a moment, before jerking to the side and knocking it off. His other paw swooped down and caught it before it touched the ground. He laughed in his usual way and ran back the way he came, not realizing the horror he had unleashed.

Fliqpy laughed deeply as he advanced towards the shivering porcupine. Flaky whimpered and pressed herself up closer to the tree, shutting her eyes and turning her head away to the side, as far away from the psychotic bear as she could manage. Not far enough. Fliqpy raised his bowie knife and slowly dragged it across her cheek. She yelped. It was a high, squeaky sound, and it only served to make Fliqpy grin even wider. And at the moment that the flat edge of the blade was pressed up against the red porcupine's neck in preparation to crush her windpipe, was when Lumpy (FINALLY) realized what was going on, no longer in the daze that had been caused by running head-first into another being's flesh and bone. The blue moose gasped and pushed himself to his feet before rushing over to where the bear and porcupine were, and quickly lifting Fliqpy into the air, taking advantage of his unusual height.

"Hey-!" the bear squawked in protest, as he was caught unawares and dropped his knife as he was picked up. He began thrashing around. If this wasn't happening in a dark forest in the middle of the night surrounded by carnage, it would be funny. As the bear struggled, Lumpy glanced around quickly and spotted Flaky's water bottle-

Mentioned in chapter 1! –Emerald

-and using one hand to hold Fliqpy by the scruff of his neck, reached out with his free arm and snatched up the water bottle, and then proceeded to dump the contents on the bear's head.

He coughed and sputtered, brought back from his psychopathic episode.

* * *

><p>OK. I'm sorry for the shortness, but I just had to get this out there to show that I haven't given up on this story! I was planning for it to be longer, but I need to brainstorm so I can word the next part properly. I know how it's gunna go, I just need to figure out the words. Also, the plot is advancing in a discernible direction now, yayyy.<p> 


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